Saturday, July 31, 2010

So Bloody Inconvenient

Even the simplest things can become a royal pain in the arse when your life is under the control of other people.

Yesterday I heard the dreaded POP that signals the demise of my vacuum flask. No biggie, you think.

First, I have to find the money to pay for it (thank you, Donors, truly). This would usually take about 6 weeks income. And then there's buying it. Local shop? Not a hope.

Ha! The only place we are allowed to buy a flask is Argos, about £8 for a small one. Oh yes, and Argos slaps on a £6 delivery fee for each item, even though they deliver to the prison by the wagon load. Nice earner for someone.

Such a simple little thing, it’s only a bloody flask, but it can play a central role in prisoners' lives, tea drinking being one of the Top Three activities. The other two are smoking and masturbation.



    Couldn't resist it; "friggin in the riggin ... 'cos there's f**k all else to do"

    Hahahaha, well it is funny!

  2. Just be glad we haven't got 5 more years of ZanuLabour; or they'd probably be handing out leaflets on how to wank correctly!

    It would probably be organized by an 'outreach quango', ensuring that women, gays and minorities are catered for; with an afterthought appendix on heterosexuals, entitled how to avoid becoming a paedophile/rapist/Conservative, or all of the above.

  3. I wouldn't put it past the new Tory pact government to outlaw wanking completely on the grounds that it is unproductive in terms of family values, and too much fun, mind you that they are so much into individual rights, its probably right up their street!

    Maybe they could run their next campaign over it:- vote Tory, vote for wankers!