Pukka Mukka

The kitchen refurbishment has been completed and the airline meals are, thankfully, tailing off. As has the asbestos seasoning of the old kitchen. The only good thing about the food of late has been the introduction of Pukka pies. This may not be world-changing but in prison, a pie that contains more than a mere scrapping of a filling is a rare and valued thing.

With the kitchen reopened, we assumed we would return to the old ways. But lo! For tea on Saturday we still have a Pukka pie. And just when you thought it can't get better than that, we have chips as well! Pie and chips...now that's pukka, mucka!

Sex and Cereal

One of the side effects of the reduced kitchen service is that we are occasionally being issued with non-standard fare.

On the weekend I was indulged with a meat pie. Not any old meant pie, but a Pukka Pie. These differ from our usual pies in that they actually have a filling that comprises more than a smear. As it was put on my plate I could feel the weight of it.

And our breakfast changed for a few days. Rather than having some generic corn-based mulch we were handed mini boxes of real Kellogg’s stuff. We can buy these ourselves but I've never felt a part of that financial group. These were a revelation. Coco Pops and Crunchy Nut, a treat for my taste buds. It was a brief episode as we have been returned to crap but it made a pleasant change.

And sex? Mr Kellogg was a strange bloke, who invented his cereals in the name of reducing masturbation. If anyone can explain the mechanics of that...!