Monday, October 4, 2010


The Mohicaned guy who recently took the piss out of my panama hat has come in for some minor mockery from the lads, who thought my story particularly funny (it was reprinted in Inside Time). It seems fair that I portray this guy in one of his finer moments as recompense!

Tony, an old-ish lifer of little physical presence, was walking the exercise yard in his local prison. A gaggle of short term cons took a liking to his watch, and took it from him.

We were outraged. Short termers mugging a Lifer? What the hell? In the event, it was the man who, today, is the Mohicaned mocker of my Panama hat who actually acted.

Cornering the short-termer on the exercise yard, he persuaded him to hand the watch back. There may be a suggestion that blood curdling threats of violence were made...who could say??

The mugger had tried to play it safe and had hidden the watch up his arse. And so, in the middle of the exercise yard, he was forced to squat and retrieve it.

Job done!


  1. JimmyGiro wins this thread.

    I suppose that, if he has to be a misogynistic twunt, at least he's a funny one.

  2. Ben, I am really looking forward to your blog on the proposed 40 hour working week at national minimum wage in prison. I can imagine everything that will be said on this side of the wall. I wait with great interest to hear your opinion. Btw this home secretary has not lost his ability to suprise as far as prison policy goes.

  3. PS I do not "tweet" but I do "dent" please make arrangements to get an account and I will be very happy to follow you as will others.